I've been meditating a great deal lately on what I find to be extremely valuable in my life, and as I have done so, God has been pointing out some things, and reminding me of how He has answered some very memorable prayers in my life.
Back in 2004, I remember crying out to God in the lat night hours of December 25th, at 11:53pm to be exact, I cried out while in the throes of my addictions, and begged God for a family. I confessed that I didn't want to live the way I was living, and that I didn't want to be alone.
I cried out to Him to lift me out of the pit that I was in, and to forgive me for running from Him into a life of sin, which had led me down the darkest paths a person could ever imagine, and I was miserable with my life. I needed Jesus.
Now I'll save the details of all that He has done to answer that prayer throughout some of my future posts, but for now, the one that I want to focus on, is how He heard my cry for Him to bring others into my life that would be a family to me.
Obviously, He gave me the gift of my wife, Christy, and her family has become my own, but in recent times, that is in the last year, especially, He has been working in that area of my life to bring some amazing people along who have become my dearest friends, and mean so much to me.
I hope they don't mind too much, and if they do, I'll come back and change the names, (Pretty sure there are very few readers anyway) but as I have been meditating on the topic of treasure, and asking God to search my heart and show me what is truly valuable in my life, He has reminded me again and again of Jeb & Kathy, who, along with their family of 5 children, have taken their place in my heart as family.
Ironically enough, Jeb and I both played roles for several years in the ministry of a local church here in the community, Jeb in the children's ministry, and myself as the worship pastor, yet, due to the busyness of those roles, we never got to know each other, and I am so glad now that God has brought our lives together in such a way.
Jeb and I ran into each other last year in downtown Wilmington while I was working the streets with the N.O.T.T.T. Foundation, and he even spent some time with me in that capacity, but little did I know that God was at work, bringing us closer together, even in those dark alleys and streets.
Being that we live in the same community (Southport/Oak Island), we eventually began to hang out more, and eventually Jeb and Kathy began coming to our house for a small group gathering that got together to study and discuss the Bible.
It's become apparent over time that Jeb and I are cut out of the same piece of cloth, and we have many, many things in common, and I find it beautiful that Jeb and I share so many similarities, yet he has character qualities that God uses to minister to me in ways that I have not been very good at affirming.
You don't have to be around these two long to realize that they love Jesus with every fiber of their being, and that they are carriers of the Holy Spirit in ways that bring out the very best in people, including their children.
There are way too many facets to these guys to share here, and just like beautifully cut gemstones, they shine and reflect light in the most beautiful ways, and they are EXTREMELY valuable in my life, and I pray that God will use us in some way to make them feel the love and joy that they bring to our lives.
Hopefully you'll get to meet them sometime, and if you do, you'll see that I haven't exaggerated one bit, and I am sure that you'll find them to be one of God greatest treasures in more ways than they may ever know.
So. In closing this post, I just want to say that I love you Jeb & Kathy, and you are greatly appreciated, valued, and we look forward to seeing how our stories will unfold in this beautiful work of God's perfect plan!
God has really been speaking to my heart about what to share at the beach for our Devotions by the Ocean Gathering that we've been doing for a few months now, and this morning as I sat with my journal at work, He showed me a beautiful passage that is often overlooked.
Coming up at the beach we will be discussing what we find to be truly valuable to us, and in an effort to discover what we keep in the 'safe' of our hearts, we will step out into the world of redefining wealth.
A few years ago, we began to see things in a different light around here at the Village Garage, and by that I mean God began to reveal Himself through His Word in response to a prayer that I lifted up to Him early one morning while sitting in the Garage.
I had been listening to first this one, then that. I had read many books 'explaining God' and I was still coming away empty feeling. So I did what I felt was right, and what I thought would help me to get the scoop firsthand. I prayed.
Not just any prayer as it turns out. I sat down with my Bible, and I prayed for God to teach me, by His Holy Spirit (the same One that wrote the Book) and to help me to understand so that I might follow Jesus more closely than man was teaching me in the various books I had been reading. It was then that I began to see what is truly valuable, and that brings us to this post.
As God began to reveal Himself to me in His Word, I began to realize many things, which I will share along the way, but I want to stay focused on the topic here, which is redefining wealth.
You see, I grew up in poverty, extreme poverty, so I never had much value for fancy things, which I feel has made it easier for me today to be content with what I have, and to see value in the things that many take for granted.
As I began to dig deeper into God's Word, it began to bury itself deep within my heart, and I began to really count the cost of following Jesus, and when stacked up against what the world has to offer, and what I've already experienced, I can see plainly that I'd much rather follow His Way.
For so many years I remained an angry guy. Angry at no one or nothing in particular, just angry, and that has caused more problems in my life than I'd like to admit, so long story short, I didn't value people or relationships.
After experiencing Jesus in a very real way in 2005, and as He led me out of the chains of addiction to drugs, alcohol, and the anger that had held me captive for so long, I began to see that I really do need others, and that God had created us for community.
The sad part about it all, is that what I was seeing in church, looked so much like the world, that I could barely tell the difference, but I knew that I am different, because the Spirit inside of me was telling me so.
My intention here is not to point out all that I find unappealing about the church of today, but to continue to pursue the discovery of how to become the church that Jesus intended, and to do so, I must continually pursue that which is most important, and that can only be found in Jesus.
This woman who came to Jesus and poured the expensive perfume over His head in Matthew 26 knew that the One she was doing this to was far more important than the perfume that she used.
We're not sure of what her financial life was like, whether she was someone who struggled to make a living, and possibly 'treasured' this jar of perfume, or if it was surplus, but what we do know is that she was willing to offer it to Jesus, regardless of its meaning to her.
In my next post, I will continue this writing, and I will try to take a look at the ideas that we will discuss at the beach during DBTO. It is my prayer that I will draw near to Jesus, and give to Him in all things, my everything.
They say this is what the alabaster jar that was used in Matthew 26:6-13 may have looked like. When cleaned up, alabaster is a beautiful and valuable mineral stone.
This week has been such a blessing, and as each day goes by, I am discovering that I have needed to slow down, and find rest in Jesus without worrying so much about all that I feel needs to be done.
I've been reading a book recently by Mother Teresa of Calcutta, and it's called 'No Greater Love'. In the book, she had something to say that has helped me perhaps more than anything has in a long time, and it has brought me to a place where I feel so much more relaxed, and I am finding my focus in the rest that I have been given with Jesus.
'Momma T', as my friend Shane Claiborne likes to call her, says this in the book; "Do not be discouraged, for if you are discouraged, then it is a sign of pride.", and I have found there to be much truth in this, and God used these words to reach into my heart, and help me to realize that I need to relax, and to accept the fact that He has created a space to be alone with me, even if that space looks much like me doing the majority of the prep work for Devotions by the Oceans, such as raising the shade canopies.
What God has spoken to my heart through the words of Mother Teresa, have helped me to slow down and spend time with Him in ways that I have not for so long now. Instead of running around like a crazy man, making copies, typing out handouts, etc. I have been spending the time reading, and being still, some days even napping in the afternoons after work, and I cannot describe the blessing in those things.
Another thing that I am exploring, is the return to my art. By this I mean that I have not been using my creativity to draw, paint, sculpt, woodwork, write, or anything else for so long now, due in part to what I felt were necessary duties pertaining to DBTO.
Christy, my awesome wife, encouraged me the other day to pick up a sketch journal, and that has been a HUGE blessing as well, as I have begun to get excited about drawing again. I'm also looking forward to doing some bigger pieces of art (murals) in our living room, which has recently been converted into a cloister of sorts, void of the television which has been there since we moved into this house almost 7 years ago.
Christy and I have had an awesome few days, and have noticed that our attitudes have been better toward one another as we worked in the house to reclaim space in the center, the very heart of the house, for folks to gather and spend time together, talking, visiting, and without the distraction of the boob tube.
We created a media room in our former master bedroom after moving our belongings into the smallest room in the house, and we are really enjoying the fresh changes that are moving us closer to ridding ourselves of usual distractions, and closer to allowing Jesus to be the very center of our home space.
We've had new visitors to our home begin popping in, and one of those was this evening in the form of our friend 'Sailboat Johnny.' We call him this because he literally lives on a sailboat in the cove in our Village.
Johnny had lost his little dog, 'Buddy', and was frantically searching for him, and after Johnny left, we decided that we should get dressed and ride around the Village for a while and see if we could spot Buddy, and we're glad that we did, because we found him hanging out with some of our neighbors down at the marina, and were able to bring him back to Johnny.
I want to close with that story, and by saying that we are so blessed. God has chosen to allow us to live in an area that is extremely beautiful, visually speaking. And there are some beautiful people here amidst the sadness of a church community divided, the drug addiction, alcoholism, depression, and poverty of a great portion of those who live here.
We used to jokingly call it the 'edge of the earth' and although it is, literally, we find that God has brought us here for a purpose, and His work for us here is not finished. We have truly found our Calcutta. (I'll explain that later)
So, as I say goodnight, I encourage you to look for Jesus in the faces of those around you. Mother Teresa called these faces 'Jesus in His most distressing disguises' , and I can honestly say that there are many around us here in the area. Despite the gluttony of a few who are tangled in the web of monetary riches, there are the faces of Jesus in the shadows, and those are the ones which Jesus has placed us here to find, to love, and to serve.
Pay attention, because you never know when your doorbell may ring, and you'll find the face of Jesus in the person looking for their lost dog. Show them love, and welcome them into your home. They need you to point them to Him.
It never ceases to amaze me how creative our government can be in their efforts to hinder justice, especially in a country founded on freedom, equality, and one who declares to be 'One Nation Under God'. Especially when it is regarding something that Jesus clearly teaches us to do.
In Luke 9, Jesus is teaching a large group of people, and when it begins to get late in the day, the disciples come to them asking Him to send the people away to nearby villages and farms to find themselves something to eat, but Jesus has a different plan. He simply tells the disciples, 'you feed them'.
It's not hard to imagine what went through their minds as He says this to them, for it is recorded in verse 13, and immediately the disciples begin to explain to Jesus that they only have a little bit of food, and besides, what did He expect them to do? Buy the food themselves?
Luke tells us that Jesus took what the disciples had and blessed it before breaking it into pieces and feeding the people, yes, 5,000 of them, but I love the fact that Matthew records in his Gospel in 14:15-21 that Jesus told the disciples to 'give me what you have' before doing this.
Now correct me if I'm wrong, but my Bible says nowhere that Jesus sent a couple of the disciples to run on down to the county office and pick up a health permit, it simply says that He told them, 'you feed them'.
In fact, if we read what Jesus teaches about the sheep and the goats, we'll see that He makes it clear that by feeding the hungry and those in need, we've done it for Him, so what would stop us from obeying Him, and doing this? Our government!
Now I'm not just trying to bash on the machine, but some friends of ours over at The Simple Way in Philly are facing this hurdle as the mayor of the city has declared that it is against the law to feed the homeless in public, or to share food, and I must agree with my friend Shane when he declares that 'this is an unjust law, and we do not feel obliged to comply.'
We have faced similar challenges here, but we press forward and do what is right, and what Jesus says we are to do, and we don't worry much about the one who can destroy our bodies, but we do tend to try our best to be obedient to the One who can 'destroy both body and soul in hell' and we have seen Him cover us with grace time and again, and many hungry mouths be fed in the name of Jesus.
God has blessed us with friends, brothers and sisters from YWAM Boston who have been coming here to minister with us in the community for the past three years, and last year when we assembled at the waterfront, you can imagine my surprise when I was told by the Southport Police Chaplain that 'we've got to have a permit to share the Gospel on the waterfront'.
Again we asked God to cover us, and again, He obliged. The problem as I see it is that we, as believers, are supposed to be making disciples of all nations according to Jesus, and I am amazed that people such as this would not be willing to fight for this right, but it is a problem today in epidemic proportions, and we MUST make a stand!
I can't imagine what would cause a Christian to place a higher value over sharing the Good News with someone who may not know, and is facing an eternity separated from God in hell, but it is time that we declare our faith, claim the boldness that we are to have, fight for justice, and pursue peace, without waver.
Tomorrow during the town council meeting there in Philly, our friends have arranged a peaceful protest at 4pm when the meeting is happening, and at 4:30 they will be having a 'Love Feast' and sharing their meals with others, according to Jesus' words, and not just the desires of corrupt officials who lack compassion for others, and have the option to grab a bite when they are hungry.
In a show of solidarity, I will be heading to our own waterfront park to do the same, with or without support, and I am hoping that some of our fellow followers will join me. I am sure there will be a faithful few, and I hope to have our time of Common Prayer during this time also.
I do this as a symbol of hope. That justice will prevail, and to reflect the love of Jesus, knowing that though our friends at TSW are many miles away, but the Holy Spirit of God unifies us across the miles.
Below I have include the story of Jesus feeding the 5,000 from the Gospel of Luke for the reader. (That's you!) Love you guys, and would love to hear your thoughts on the matter.
Tim
Jesus Feeds Five Thousand
10 When the apostles returned, they told Jesus everything they had done. Then he slipped quietly away with them toward the town of Bethsaida. 11 But the crowds found out where he was going, and they followed him. He welcomed them and taught them about the Kingdom of God, and he healed those who were sick. 12 Late in the afternoon the twelve disciples came to him and said, “Send the crowds away to the nearby villages and farms, so they can find food and lodging for the night. There is nothing to eat here in this remote place.”
13 But Jesus said, “You feed them.”
“But we have only five loaves of bread and two fish,” they answered. “Or are you expecting us to go and buy enough food for this whole crowd?” 14 For there were about 5,000 men there.
Jesus replied, “Tell them to sit down in groups of about fifty each.” 15 So the people all sat down. 16 Jesus took the five loaves and two fish, looked up toward heaven, and blessed them. Then, breaking the loaves into pieces, he kept giving the bread and fish to the disciples so they could distribute it to the people. 17 They all ate as much as they wanted, and afterward, the disciples picked up twelve baskets of leftovers!
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